Fifteen years ago I began training to become a spiritual director. It’s a specialized ministry, that is about having sacred conversations with people, as they work on paying close attention to what God has to say to them. It’s rooted in the faith that God has hopes and dreams for us, and is involved in our lives, and cares what we do with them.
The spiritual director doesn’t speak for God, but listens carefully to the person's stories, and reflects back what they hear, what they notice. Very often, if a person has a deep question, the spiritual director can help them see that along with the question, they have also been given, if not the exact answer, at least clues about where to search, what they need to do, to approach an answer.
To journey with a person to the territory of deep questions and answers, we need to be more courageous in talking about “real” things. The concerns, and joys, the worries and delights that are often below the surface of everyday conversation.
It is not always easy to go to those deep places with people.
The basic training for spiritual direction took about two years. Each learning year began and ended with a week long retreat. At the close of the first retreat a wise and experienced teacher showed us a leave-taking ritual. This was a way to say goodbye, as we were all about to load our cars, and head home. People had traveled from all over Ontario, and some from out of the province, to begin their training.
Our teacher said that many years ago, she’d volunteered to serve in a mission field. Before she went to Africa, she visited every person who was important to her, and told them what she would want them to hear, if that was the last time she saw them. She had every intention of returning, but also knew she was going to a place where there were no guarantees.
None of us can really know for sure what will happen tomorrow, or in the next five minutes. We don’t always dwell on that, and that’s okay. But it’s also good for us, spiritually, psychologically, and for the health of our relationships, to visit that deeper part of us, that knows that nothing in this life is for sure.
My wife and I attended a funeral on Friday for our friend, who was the minister at the local Unitarian Universalist church. His partner called us last Tuesday to tell us Rod had died in a car accident. Rod and I had plans to have dinner together the next day. He had something he wanted to talk about. I can only guess what that might have been.
The leave-taking ritual at the retreat went like this. We each had the opportunity to say, “I’m leaving here soon. If I never see you again, I’d like you to know…”
Each of us had to fill in the blank, for each person with whom we had that conversation. We’d spent quality time with each other, as we spoke out loud about the real, below the surface truths of our own lives. A week of deep listening was a good start to building trust, and friendship. I am still in touch with some of those I met, 15 years ago.
This morning’s parables are two versions of essentially the same story. A person discovers a treasure. It’s either something buried in a field, or a pearl that from under the sea. It’s interesting that the precious thing- comes either from deep in the ground or deep under water. Going deep, for what’s important.
The person in the parable just has to have it. They sell all they have to raise funds to purchase the treasure.
A good parable can raise more questions than it answers.
Is there actually a treasure that would be worth giving up everything else in your life?
How would the person in the story live, now that they are homeless and penniless?
It does not always work to draw a direct lesson from a parable, or to interpret the story literally.
People always try anyway, because if you can come up with a way to explain the story, it’s like successfully getting a saddle on a wild horse. It domesticates the story, and makes it safer, more digestible.
Preachers especially like to saddle a story with “the meaning”. It’s like we feel like we’re supposed to have all the answers.
Some story tamers would say the awesome treasure is faith, or salvation. What could be more valuable than your faith in God, and God’s promises to each of us?
A variation is to say humans are the treasure, for which Jesus trades everything, including his own life. (I am less taken with that reading.)
Those interpretations are interesting, but giving “the answer” can get in the way of encouraging people to think for themselves.
I’d rather each of us have our own chances to wrestle with the parable, go deep for ourselves. Sometimes a story can work like a mirror, that shows you something about yourself, and what’s on your heart.
This week this parable has me reflecting on what it means to say goodbye, if only for a time.
I start vacation after this service, and beyond that, I’ll be on sabbatical leave until December. I will be back to lead services for one Sunday each in October and November, but otherwise, I may not see many of you for quite a while.
For about two weeks of the sabbatical I will be in Israel for a study tour with other United Church people. We will spend time in Jerusalem, as well as in Bethlehem, Nazareth and the Galilee region. Our local hosts are involved in ecumenical peace work amongst Jews, Christians and Muslims. We will be learning about relations between Palestine and Israel.
It will be the farthest I’ve ever been from home, and I know this is one of many places in the world where the unexpected happens on a regular basis.
If we were saying goodbye, and I knew I might not ever see you again, I would want to tell you, the truest thing I know is held safely like a treasure in a few lines of scripture, which are my absolute favourite, in the whole Bible.
They are my pearl of great price for which I might trade everything.
If I had only these lines of scripture, they would be enough.
They’re from the first letter of John, in the fourth chapter. They remind me to be humble in my certainties and pronouncements about religion, and to place my trust in what religion is meant to point us towards.
“No one has seen God, ever. But if we love one another, God dwells deeply within us, and God’s love becomes complete in us—perfect love!” Amen
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